The Ted Report: Collingwood vs Sandy Round

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AeonFlux
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The Ted Report: Collingwood vs Sandy Round

Post: # 1791096Post AeonFlux »

Everyone's favourite Norwegian internet troll and emerging young fiction writer, NorwegianTed12 has finished his assignments for One Nation, and for Clive Parmigiana First, and has kindly submitted the following report.

Ted only got to the ground about half way through the second quarter. (He was delayed because he was speaking to some ex-AFL players.) So that has to be taken into account when reading this report.

Norwegianted12 wrote: Sun 12 May 2019 10:24pm
Lovely day for a bit of suburban footy. 17 degrees, and not a puff of wind. (Collingwood supporters, and negative St Kilda supporters aside.) Great to be able to hear the players, and to be able to get onto the ground during breaks.

The main scoreboard wasn't working. Everyone had to rely on the little scoreboard on the fence on the outer half forward flank. No time clock either.

Was a good game.

Sandy went into the last with a two goal lead. That became three after a Billy mark and goal. Yes, Billy! He’s a champion presence.

Then it was all Collingwood on the scoreboard, till they had a five point lead.

Sandy then woke up. Hooray!

For the last ten minutes the footy did not cross to Collingwood’s side of the centre of the ground.
Sandy peppered away.
Sandy blew opportunity after opportunity.
None of that was Richo’s fault.

Sandy finally ended up winning by one point. Hooray.

That Collingwood five point lead was whittled away... one point at a time. Yep. Sandy got there by kicking (mis-kicking) six behinds to no score from their total dominance of the last ten minutes of the game. It's just so good to see some consistency between how the seniors and the ressies play. Makes the step up to the next level easier for our guys.



Player assessments.
(Allowing for having arrived late to the game, and for when the play was on the other side of the ground, and for when I was still talking to a couple of ex-AFL players.)

- Someone named King 12. Took a good mark that wasn't allowed. Otherwise, didn't see him touch it. Not once. Nor lay a tackle. Most of the time he seemed to be where the ball wasn't. The few times it was kicked to him and his man, he was easily moved off the drop point of the footy. But he looks the goods. Bookmark it.
Don't know about the first quarter, but he played all of the second (that I saw) and most of the third. Spent the entire final quarter sitting on the bench. No doubt that was planned.
Moves very well, effortlessly across the ground. What an athlete! Bookmark it.
Got through unscathed - which was I reckon all they were really hoping for.
- Gilbo. Very good VFL player. Is now past it as an AFL player.
- Armo. See Gilbo. Great leader and teacher. Future coaching career? Bookmark it.
- Clavalino. Has a long way to go in the 'bulking up' stakes. Will make it.
- Rowe. Better than I thought. Could help out in the seniors if needed - ruck, back and forward. Bookmark it.
- Marsh. (Unless he's still in need of building his fitness) should not have been dropped!
- Clarke. Disappointing. Very. And interestingly (tellingly?) spent nearly all of that last ten minutes on the bench. But he’ll be fine.
- Young. Didn't see him. Was he playing? Checked the numbers. No 41. Ok, he played. Still didn't see him.
- Hind. Very very quick. Twice. Didn't see him get it any other times. (Were his other 17 touches in the first quarter and a half?)
- Joyce. Another great mover. Good hands. Good kick. (Which could hold him back at St Kilda.) Seeing him right up close, isn't big enough to hold down a key position. More a flanker, third tall defender. Like the idea of trying him in the middle or on a wing. Interestingly, at the three quarter time huddle he had plenty of tactical stuff to say, and was complimented on it by his line coach.
- Rice. Totally wasted as a defensive forward. Hardly touched it. In fact, did he touch it? Not sure he did, other than to throw the footy to a Skunk whose free it was. Play him in the guts, or down back. Bookmark it.
- White. Looked alright, but nothing standout to say "pick me!"
- Coffield. See White.
- * Billy. Took that mark, and never looked like missing the shot on goal. He's actually a good kick. But how would anyone know??? Rucked well, with some thumping hit outs, but very few were directed. His opponent was smaller, and inexperienced. (Read: Tohill; 191 cm and 85kg, and ~3 games of experience.) Whilst Billy clearly won the ruck duel, he didn't dominate like he should if he has claims to being an AFL ruckman. (He doesn't, He isn't.)
If we need another ruck before Lazar builds fitness or Lou Peirce recovers – go with Rowe.
* Obviously the Committee could grant Ted only so much 'poetic licence'.


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Re: The Ted Report: Collingwood vs Sandy Round

Post: # 1791105Post Scollop »

I posted the below 10 mimutes before the above. Having second thoughts about whether Billy earns a recall...maybe as you say, we might try Rowe

viewtopic.php?f=1&t=97470&start=50#p1791094


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Re: The Ted Report: Collingwood vs Sandy Round

Post: # 1791106Post guitars4 »

You are good :wink:


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Re: The Ted Report: Collingwood vs Sandy Round

Post: # 1791138Post tedtheodorelogan2018 »

Another Ted Report! I love it!

The legend grows! 💪😁

I really appreciate the concern in what I post. They bulk bill for psychiatric help these days too I think.


Posters that have admitted they were wrong about Hanna's gastro and the club didn't create a cover story.
Total = 1.
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